Cut my life into pieces, This is my last resort.

Sooo...It's July 20th at 10.56 Pm and I am sitting on my bed listening to Papa Roach. So I woke up today at 6.54 Pm and I went to the bathroom like I do everytime I wake up and I come out and my mom tells me to come into the living room. Her mother and her were there crying and she tells me that Rutger can't use his back legs. So she's holding my hand when she tells me and I just let go and walk away, she keeps telling me to come here and I just run into my room and close the door and sit in front of it and cry. Meanwhile, she's outside of the door telling me to open it. It takes about a minute and then I just scoot away from the door enough to let the door open. So she then proceeds to open the door and she sits on the floor with me and we just cry for about twenty minutes. She then tells me that If he won't be able to walk by tomorrow then she's going to have to take him up to work and put him to sleep; I just continued to cry. I cried for an hour straight and now it's just on and off crying. I love my Rut. I might not have treated him the best but I still loved him..I'm gonna miss him molesting Ashley. I want a new dog to replace him...and I'll be nice to this one. *sighs* I don't want my baby boy to die...I really don't. :/ Well I'm gonna go...bye.