Thursday, December 31, 2009
If I Mattered To You, Then All I would See, Is Indigo.
Okay...Here's The Sad Part, We weren't even together and he still broke my heart. Why do I always end up liking someone so much that it hurts when they say that they like someone else? This one dude...He'll never know exactly how much I like him. Everytime he talks about this girl he likes it's like my heart is splitting open more and more. It's always like this with guys I like...but he's the one guy that I've liked more than any other guy, even Ivan. I'll never forget Ivan. He was the one who broke the most important promise I've ever wanted anyone to keep. But I can't tell this guy that. Why? Because he's madly in like, he might even love her, with this other girl. And why wouldn't he be? I mean, she's probably a gorgeous size zero with baby blue eyes and brown hair and no acne. While I'm a hideous size 14/16 with acne, brown hair and hazel eyes. I'm the girl that doesn't stand out in a crowd. She probably is. I just can't keep liking people like this, Especially him. Maybe if she wasn't in the picture, and if I lived closer, then things would be different. I just...feel so helpless right now. That might sound extreme, but it's true. I don't even know if he cares about me anymore. It's gotten to the point where I love talking to him but I also hate the hurt that I feel when we talk because I know that he's talking to her and would rather talk to her than me. I don't know....I guess I just need to get out of the picture and let him continue on liking her and not have him worry about me...I just don't know what to do. Penguin...if you read this...can you help me...please?
Posted by Heather Nicole. at 10:06 PM