"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable."

Take a broken girl, treat her like a famous princess, give her the best seats in the house. Tell her something true when all she's known are lies. Tell her about forgiveness, the possibility of freedom, tell her she was made to dance in white dresses. All these things are true.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

I'm doing this tonight, you're probably going to start a fight.

The date and time are July 15th at 3.46 in the morning and I'm sitting on my bed listening to 'N Sync thinking. I woke up at around 3 in the morning from a nap that I took at like 9 in the afternoon...hehe I just wrote 9 in the afternoon. Panic At The Disco made a song called Nine In the Afternoon on their album Pretty. Odd. I don't much care for that compact disc because I feel it's too...Not themselves, if you know what I mean. I just finished Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and am now working on Donorboy by Brendan Halpin. Chip sent me this book from Marshall Illinois because we were discussing it and he said that I might like it and I must tell you that he's right. I may only be on page 23 (there are no chapters >.<) but I still like it. So yesterday I woke up at around 5 in the afternoon and my dad was cutting the yard. I mean, it was our day to be together and all he did was cut the yard and then we played a little Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire but I quickly got bored with that. He then proceeded to go outside and smoke and when he returns he tells me he's going to go. I'm just thinking... It's supposed to be our day and all you did was mow the yard and play a couple of minutes of Harry Potter with me. Yeah, THAT'S really fulfilling your fatherly duties. Maybe I am as spoiled as everyone says I am. He made the comment that I went from little girl to a beautiful (which I am not) young woman. You see, my father spent most of my childhood either out of the country or in his own house with that crazy woman he lives with so he's always saying how he missed out on watching me grow up and it's like. It just aggrivates me so when he says that he missed out on watching me grow up and here I am almost a senior in High School and he can still watch me grow up from Now until I graduate but it's like he's making NO attempt at doing that. It's whatever though. So, after he left mama was hungry so I decided to drive us down to KFC/Taco Bell and get us some food. I'm a huge fan of sprite and of course they have Pepsi and their shit so I thought that if I got a Sierra Mist then it would taste exactly like Sprite...Boy was I wrong, It tasted like it had more lemons or limes in it than Sprite does and it was just, argh. NASTY! Okay, lately it seems like I'm losing all my friends. I'm not just saying that to be getting attention because I'm NOT, but it just seems like they are all with their boyfriend, or are always busy and whatnot. Like this one friend, I love her to death. She's one of my best and closest friends but she's going out with this one dude and it seems like everytime we hang out that's all she talks about. Don't get me wrong, I love being there and helping her but it does get annoying after awhile. And my friend Kelsey, We are always trying to hang out and make plans but whenever we do she always has something else and more important to do or isn't able to come over. It's like, I'm watching all of my friends grow apart from me and I don't know how to let them get on with their lives and still be friends with them. I feel like reading the book James got me for my 16th birthday 'Bad Childhood, Good Life'. Oh, I was having a conversation with Noel today about what's been going on and whatnot. He has a wife named Roxy who everyone hated in Culinary. I didn't really have a problem with her because she never did anything to me, But I didn't like how she changed Noel. Anyways, Yeah, They're married and are expecting a son named Zachary Dylan Vargas. I'm so excited for them, I really am. Noel is a really great guy and he deserves to be happy. We were talking about how he goes back to Missouri in August for National Guard training again. I then told him about how if I got a job and some money saved up that Mama and I were going to go to St. Louis to Wrockstock the Third, He told me that I would love the Arch. If I was to get a job and save up money I don't think I would want to go to Wrockstock. I was thinking that maybe I would want to go to Illinois and hang out with Madeline and Chip since they are like....right over there, somewhere, but whatever happens happens. *Sighs* I think I'm gonna go visit the rest of the World Wide Web and see what all I can get Daddy to get me for Christmas. Later.

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